Here’s a random, out of context picture of Larry.

 

That’s all.

Franks and Beans/Beans and Franks DVD artwork

Since the “Beans and Franks” episode played so heavily into our *very collectible* season two DVD design, I thought I’d post some of those images here for all to see.  In fact, now everyone can print and mass-produce their VERY OWN copies of Franks and Beans season two DVD cases!  Won’t that be fun!

Some notes on the above image:

– The baked bean background is a Franks and Beans original.  Mitch Mitchell, he of the camera-owning status, made a trip over to the “studio” to snap some pictures of baked beans that we poured out of a can.  At high resolution, baked beans look kind of gross.

– We added our very own QR code to the back of the case.  Scanning the code brings you right to…this site.

– We should probably come up with a different logo for the show for subsequent releases, as look at this one makes me sad and wistful for the hair I used to have.  It was beautiful, really.

The above and below images are from the DVD insert; on one side is the episode guide, and on the other, a Beans and Franks-specific reference.  The episode guide is obviously a take on the nutritional label on most foods; judging by this list, I’d say we skimped on the commentaries this season.

The special features section includes my favorite joke on the insert: “DVD becomes cheap Frisbee with varied results”.

The other side of the insert is an ad for Franks and Beans Brand Beans and Franks.  Try some today, won’t you?

 

When we decided to streamline the product and go with the slipcases instead, I designed this sticker to go on the back of the sleeves.  It’s basically a condensed version of the above, with a new (and perhaps funnier) slogan.  I managed to keep the QR code and the picture of the can.

Larry and I took these DVDs to Comic-Con in 2012 and – get this – actually sold a few of them.  I’ve got a stack of these sitting in my house at the moment, taking up space and making me consider throwing them off of a bridge.  If Larry and I make it back to San Diego this summer, I think we’ll take a day and hand the rest of them out to innocent and unsuspecting line-goers.  And maybe, just maybe, someone will watch ’em.

Episode 42.1 – Beans and Franks (Alternate Audio Edition)

The last song we used was just a LITTLE too close to being available in the public domain for our tastes.

Blog 44 – Beans and Franks

And there we are!  It took 44 episodes for Franks and Beans to do an episode about beans.  I believe that both Larry and I should be commended for, if nothing else, our patience in introducing something that we all probably saw coming – Franks and Beans Beans and Franks.  Our show is, after all, named after baked beans.  Oh, and Larry’s last name is whatever.  But the point is, we held off until the time was right, and the right time was…episode 44, “Beans and Franks”.

The premise of this episode is fairly simple: Larry and I decide to branch out, and what property doesn’t attempt to do this after it’s been established for a while?  We put a lot of money into a product that ends up being a bust.  We decide to forge ahead anyway, passing the bill of goods on to whoever would decide to eat some baked beans with our faces on the can.  Any one of these concepts could serve as the primary focus, but economical as we are, we put them all into one episode of Franks and Beans, in which we spend a lot of time spitting beans into a bowl, and then making Larry’s dad eat them afterwards as we watched in horror.

The episode was pretty easy to follow, if I can say so, but it did include a lot of dialogue and not many cuts in the action.  To combat this, we might have taken some time to study our lines, but instead we pulled a Marlon Brando and wrote some of our lines down, placing them by the camera so we could cheat and look at them while the camera rolled.  This is easiest to spot when I’m listing off the fake ingredients in our fake baked bean product, as I’m looking just a little bit to the side during the whole thing.  As is often the case, though, the low definition quality of the upload to YouTube certainly covers up some of our shame.

“Beans and Franks” also includes a few VERY TECHNICAL effects, including the picture-in-picture deal that is sure to be a feature on all televisions from the years of 1999-2003.  Seriously, who has the multitasking capabilities to watch two different shows at the same time, only one of the shows is on mute and is tiny and in the corner of the television?  Maybe this was just a feature developed specifically for pornography, like the “private browsing” feature on Internet browsers.

In all, this was a simple concept, but one that I thought worked well, to the point that I wouldn’t be surprised if a number of other comedy shows have tried different variations on the same themes, which is valid, I’m sure, in its many forms.

Our “No!” ending this episode gets some special attention, as it lasts nearly as long as the main segment itself.  In this extended feature, we say goodbye to Larry’s trusted (but not always trustworthy) Jeep, which took him to places like Grindstone, PA and, presumably, other places in the many years in which he had it, stretching all the way back to when he was in high school, whenever that was.  A loyal friend to the end, the Jeep, in its later years, took on the persona of a car that wouldn’t really go anywhere, with a window that wouldn’t really roll up or down, with a radio that wouldn’t really play music other than “All Star” by Smashmouth, and so we at Franks and Beans decided to give it one last sendoff by destroying it in a hellstorm of fury, complete with a sad montage from earlier episodes and a song that expressed the longing and regret Larry and I both felt about using the Jeep to kill that guy that one time.

This episode comes with an “alternate audio version”, which means that Larry and I couldn’t ultimately decide on which song to play over the final montage.  The original choice, mine, was “I Will Wait for You” by Connie Francis, which is one of the saddest songs I’ve ever heard, though this is most likely because I associate it with the “Jurassic Bark” episode of Futurama.  If you’ve never seen this episode before, enjoy the fact that you haven’t been subjected to what is possibly the most heartbreaking episode of any television show in the history of the world.  If you have seen it…then go and hug your dog.

Larry, as is his right, chose the Michelle Branch song “Goodbye to You”, which, as you might know, is actually about a car.  Also, Larry played softball with Michelle Branch one time and he won’t stop talking about it, which is cool, I guess.  Take a listen to both versions (I’ll post 44.1 in a few days) and choose your own ending, just like those books…what’re they called?  Whatever, it’s not important.

Here’s a picture of the can itself, which looks like it contains delicious, delicious beans and doesn’t have a label that was just printed at home and then slapped onto a can of Campbell’s baked beans or anything.  This served as the theme to our highly successful (…) Franks and Beans volume 2 DVD, the case for which contained a fake nutritional guide and everything.  This was a fun episode from start to finish, and in an alternate reality where people watch this show, it’s become one of our signatures.

The Franks and Beans…uh…half year in review.

2013 has come and gone, and hey!  Franks and Beans, despite all evidence to the contrary, is still around.  The band has not dissolved.  Larry and I do not have creative differences.  There are still stories to be told.  The cat’s in the cradle.

I don’t know if it’s fair to say that Franks and Beans went on hiatus for the second half of 2013, but the fact is I haven’t posted anything new on this site since, what, June?  That’s kind of dumb.  I suppose that there are a few reasons for this, but the prevailing one stemmed from some uncertainty about the F&B domain name and branding.  It’s a long story, and it’s not something that I’ll get into in any great detail, but after some long discussions and some stressful weeks, I needed to take a break, and a few days stretched into a big part of last year.  It was never my intention to let the site go unmanned for so long, but the start of 2014 seems as good a time as any to wind the machine back up and start posting again.  So, you know, tell all of your friends.

In the meantime, let’s talk about the weird stats package that WordPress puts together at the end of each year!  As with last year’s presentation, this one brought out some information that is, at the very least, mildly interesting.  And if there’s any way to describe Franks and Beans, it’s “mildly interesting”, so let’s see some of the highlights!This particular screen made me laugh (well, not out loud, just that kind of Internet laughing where you breath slightly harder out of your nose), because our most popular posts for the whole year are not our videos, and four of the five aren’t even ABOUT our videos.  More people come to this site, apparently, to read about comics than they do to watch our HILARIOUS AND INVENTIVE comedy.  So the plan is working.  Perhaps I need to work on my tagging…I’m sure that’s it.

According to WordPress’s highly personal evaluation, my writing has staying power.  I am not going to argue with this.It’s a relief that a number of people find this site by doing an Internet search for the phrase “Franks and Beans”.  Perhaps they are searching for the canned hot dog accessory, but I’ll take what I can get.  It’s less of a relief that some people come to this site by searching for the phrase “jetgil caton porno”.  Our Jet Boy/Jet Girl Comic-Con photos probably caught a few stragglers (who were immediately disappointed, I’m assuming).  This information makes me want to do a similar search, because I have no idea what “jetgil caton” mean, but I’m fairly certain that I would be scarred and saddened if I took the leap, because whatever the terms mean, I probably don’t want to see the porno version, though I’m willing to admit that there’s a chance I could be wrong.  Some folks also found this site while searching for “Bronson Pinchot shirtless”, and really, haven’t we all done this at some point?

Also, many thanks to Lauren of “Gregarious Girdler” fame, who is our number four referencer, beating out the all-powerful Facebook in that regard.  She didn’t do as well as the Pittsburgh Comicon website, though.  So step it up, Girdler.

2013 was an interesting year for Franks and Beans.  2014, though, should bring bigger and better things.  And also some posts.  Let’s make it happen.